So, long-time readers will know that I was asked to be the “Best Woman” in my longtime guy friend’s wedding. Original plan was a black dress or girl tux kind of outfit for me, to match the groom’s side, as is recommended by bridal journals galore.
Well, the mother of the bride apparently thinks that my presence on the groom’s side in a black dress will “detract from the attention to the bride” in that “everyone will be wondering why she’s up there.” Um, that’s why they have programs. At any rate, the “compromise” that was reached is for me to be in the same dress as the bridesmaids, same color, and they will mix up the two parties so that it’s girl-guy-girl on each side basically. Okay, fair enough…except the dress color is lilac (not a color meant for redhead consumption). But…fine, so be it, right?
Except that this is the dress. Now, I probably wouldn’t wear whatever dress this will be again anyways, because I don’t look good in lilac or purple in general…but that dress? Dude, there are like tons of beautiful dresses for bridesmaids at David’s…that dress (in my opinion) can never be anything but a bridesmaid’s dress, and even that for just a year or two, as the styling of it will be out of style here pretty soon. And I hate to criticize the bride’s choice, because I’m sure she picked it with her bridesmaids there and they were all happy with it, but now it’s being forced on me when I was *not* involved in the process of the choice.
So…I talked to my guy friend about this last night, in tears for part of it, because I feel like I should just step down if the MOB is so uncomfortable with this. But he doesn’t want that to happen. And I can’t stand the idea of wearing that dress. The alternate plan is for me to wear a completely different dress in lilac…which I think will just look like they couldn’t fit me into the bridesmaid’s dress, so they got me a different dress. Or, worse yet, that I was a last minute addition. And even if I am in the same dress…now it just looks like I’m a bridesmaid on the wrong side rather than someone specifically up there for him.
Seriously, this sounds minor…but I mean, I’m planning my own wedding over here in the background, and I wouldn’t want an arrangement like this. I feel like the MOB is not thinking this through, and I also feel like I’m getting screwed here. If the plan had been for me to be in the same dress as the bridesmaids, one would imagine I would have gotten to go on the trip to pick out the dress, as the bridesmaids did.
I seriously just want to step down at this point. Finding a guy to replace me should *not* be hard, and tuxes for guys are much easier to handle at the last minute. I can be Andrew’s “right hand helper” all day without standing up there in an uncomfortable outfit, messing up her big day. 🙁